I am not an “angry black woman.”
I am an angry woman who just so happens to be black. Know the difference! We have real feelings and emotions just like everyone else.
My anger has always been the hardest thing for me to control. The earliest memory I have of my anger being a real issue is when I was 11 years old. I blew up on a classmate after feeling too overwhelmed but I don’t remember While unpacking childhood trauma I’ve realized that it’s still an issue. Although, it’s not as bad as it used to be because I know my limits now.
Here are some tips for anyone dealing with anger issues:
1. You can’t fight everyone.
2. Everything really doesn’t need a response. I know that’s easier said than done, but sometimes it’s ok to just let ignorant comments fly.
3. People are provoking you because it’s EASY. They see that they can piss you off by doing very little, so they take pleasure in that.
4. Trip them up by smiling and laughing when they least expect it.
5. Everyone hates it, but try to find the root of the problem. Is there a particular reason why you blow up? Is it a trigger word/feeling? Remember new situations can bring up old emotions that you forgot about or repressed. Please know the difference between when the actual situation has made you upset vs when the situation brought up old feelings that made you upset.
6. Make peace and happiness your number one priority at all times! No matter what obstacles you face.
Childhood trauma is so common amongst most people, that it’s hard not to talk about it. We hate unpacking things and having difficult conversations, but do what needs to be done. If you have to talk about it, talk. Go to therapy! Get help! Don’t let it fester and turn into something you can no longer control. As usual thank you so so so much for reading!